Hetic days...Falling asleep...Fustration filled

School ends at 4pm for the rest of our journey to the big big O

Stress has begin to kick in, Problems are hounding me and Fatique is hot on my tracks. But Perservere I will..Stand strong and never fall..

D and T has become a serious pain since i have no idea or any strategy to do my product and i only have about 2 more days to finish it...Miracle, you haven't happen in a long time, maybe you could show me your face soon??

To: Lady Luck

i've noticed the you have been by my side and i'm very thankful for it,i'm grateful beyond words..But still could you help me to the end?? For i have no idea what was the reason that you left my side during today's O level chinese Oral.. Was it because i didn't practice on my own?? Or is it that my mentality of not doing well that built a barrier that secluded you away?? If thats so, I have no words to express my apology but still I promise to work hard so would you still continue to bystand at my side?? I'm maybe too selfish, naive or everything negative but still, till now all i could was to hope..I've tried, Believe me..

Thank you

Yours Faithfully
Kenny

P.S but still I wouldn't rely on you too much.

Destiny brought us together from strangers to something more..
yet it was just like walking on egg shells,
unstable and suprisingly dangerous..
and yes those fragile eggshell broke into shattered pieces,
mixing up with our puzzle pieced emotions, or at least just mine...
Yes a second chance it gives,
it relieved all the pain i had suffered
but only to amplify the damage that dawned upon me,
swallowing me completely from the inside..
I've left it with fate, to decide my opaque future,
leaving time to turn it into transparent and finally translucent..
Yet what fate had shown me, was a reality from a dream and a dream in reality..
it took away what i meant to and store aside to spite me..
Scratches from my dreams slowly formed ugly cracks,
wishing upon a star seemed to be proven useless..
The naive me was suffering,
the souless and spineless me was winning..
Learning that giving up things you wanted and your lifelong habits would never be able to bring back rewards...
neither the things you wanted back..
Bitter tears of sorrow dripped among those sour tears of jealousy,
both caused by an unknown identity...
The question WHY? still resonates around my mind..
i'll end this questions for fate to continue...
show me,the future that unfolds

Was Superbly busy soo yeah, i'll recount back the days..

17th(Tues) June

Had school as usual in the morning,second day that Mr Lam(our dnt instructor) didn't come so DnT was no DnT at all..Well went to drama instead,carried on working on our play for Ignite our school's concert..It was a full dress rehersal as photos had been taken..As usual 0% of photogenic skills..as our play requires long sleeve Tees and Long pants, we were sweating like pigs on stage(actually pigs don't sweat,thats why they roll in mud), the lights seemed to be the fire barbequeing us, so we have 11 Ba Kwa on stage..
Went home and had a short nap before leaving for genting with 2 aunts,1parents,1brother and 1 cousin( took the Grassland 草原)
after watching Nobit and 美女煮神 on the bus and a few minutes of unbelieveable lame games, finally went into a deep slumber, yet awoken to have a pit stop for snacks..being typical Kiasu Singaporeans,of course we bought snacks(didn't regret it at all)..Then Slept again till we reached genting(7 hours ride)

18th June(wednesday)

reached Genting at 5am..(stayed at Resort Hotel 4☆ XP)BUT since we could only check in after 5am, we wondered around the cool,enticing weather that soon got too cool for us, i must comment that it was a really different air that covered that place(DUHHH) at first I felt like it was helium gas,except that it didn't made me talk in that light spirited voice..So went to First world shopping area and walked around, was dozing off as we strolled in the unfamiliarised place. After walking for an hour, we finally settled down for a good 30minutes to have our hot drinks to soothe our freezing physical body.(prata at 3RM...around $1.20 for 1 prata,PLAIN)
So as the adults went into the casino for fun(they don't gamble,just to experience what the IR resort would bring(nahs they just want to find something to kill time that doesn't require walking) so while waiting for them,slept at the bar top counter of an unopened restaurant..woke up at around 7:30 to walk around again, with my bro and mum.So my bro and I got tickets for the unlimited ride for the outdoor themepark and the indoor themepark[costs us 51RM each that is.]so took off almost immediately after purchasing the ticket.BUT didn't have much use of leaving so quickly as NOTHING and i meant NOTHING was opened for us to play.. had to wait till 9am( lazy to write down other stuff, don't think you've the patience to read em too) so i'll just give you the format, went funtasy land(arcade) - 4D cinemax - bumper car - euro express - Ripley's Believe it Or Not(something like an exhibition).. after that had lunch at the foot court( SUPER EXPENSIVE) then went back to the hotel at around 1pm..After watching Snakes On a Plane,fell asleep, woke up at 4pm,went to outdoor themepark wit bro and heres the order again ( btw found my courage to take thrill rides that i once lost again...remember nothing would seemed scary if you are determined to try)in order of rides again - Pirate Train - Dinosaurland - Corkscrew - Grand Pix Fun Kart - Flying Dragon.. wanted try many more( like Mine Train,Flume Ride,Flying Coaster,Toboggan) BUT didn't had time for it..
Dinner at a Hainanese restaurant( had pork chops)
After that played Pool with bro...Well getting better i guess?
Back to hotel... After few rounds of card games,my bro and i went to buy MaryBrown(fastfood restaurant 24hrs)then went back to watch soccer..(fell asleep after 20mins)...

19th June (Thurs)

Didn't do much today...other than 2 games of bowling(practically sucked at it)
saw MayTze at e bus terminal, was leaving and she just arrived, but we walked around for alittle while before we bade goodbye...(watched many chinese movies on the way back).. reached Singapore at 9++pm..

Pictures post later

hmmm i guess i'm a superbly dumb guy which mouth and mind aren't connected..i'm apologizing in advance to everyone if i say another mindless rubbish speech, i'll work on it..thanks for your kind understanding XP

I've been waiting, even when doing things, that thought keep resonating around my head, holding on my cell expecting a sms anytime but it never comes. I've waited for a week, thinking that you'll remember despite your busy schedule. I understood that you're busy and I don't really think that I'm of any importance in your life, besides it was something you agreed on to somewhat satisfy my question.I've been trapped in between my schedule, thinking if you've not happen to forget then this following week I might just be able to push in some time as my friend asked me a question of which was of a greater value to me? It was a tug between my guilt consciousness and my own pleasure..
but no matter what answer it is, its just another one of my unreal fantasy i guess.. Though little but it troubles me alot..

yesterday another weird dream occured, another dream out of an action movie i guess..

Snacking can evolved into a hobby i guessed..

My Eyes And Ears Are Always Opened For You Borrowing 24/7/356 a year!!

Happy Father's DAY!!!!!!!!

Happy Birthday Liying(though its 3.30am) so maybe belated?

This morning was another drag, parents went off to see my bro's army graduation festival or something like tad, went to do something about my bank account then went to play soccer for alittle while..

then went to hab dinner at Crab Party(near the s'goon stadium).ordered 5 dishes, 3 drinks.. Yet the total cost is $216++... that meant almost $55 for each of us...Main Cause?Was Not The Main Course..but the LOBSTER WITH MANGO SALAD..man i regreted suggesting it,this taught me a lesson(when they write Seasonal price for the pricing for something,IT MEANS YOU MUST CHECK BEFORE ORDERING)

so took a bus to Kovan to buy clothing..

IP zone style doesn't suit me so bought 3 pieces of shirt from Hang Teng..also signned up a Hang Teng membership card, kinda worth it...
50% if i goes back to kovan but 25% at others place..(my birthday month means 50% everywhere though) so its quite worth it (lasts 30 months)

SO anione nids shirts from Hang Teng,you can borrow e card from me..

So Home Again, Dnt Tml

Last Great News
----------------
DRAMA GOT INTO E SEMI FINALS FOR THE NATIONAL CRIME PREVENTION BOTH THE SENIOR AND JUNIOR TEAM YEAHS V^^

Strange Dreams have been dominating my fantasy world these days, its weird,funny,strange,bizarre,awkward,painful,happy,grueling all at the same time..

i'm not sure but is it a warning?? should i stop what i'm trying to do?? if it is, then its something wrong, its not right for me, i don't want it to happen..i'll remember to shut my eyes real tight and perherps try once again to wish upon a star..


------------------------------

Today woke up at 8++ and went to drama at around 10am, lasted till 1pm..
then 7/12 went Prataing..jokes were cracked instead of eggs..

well after that, me,jiaxin n izzu went to e old old upper serangoon road shopping centre(used to be a regular place for me)
had quite alot of fun there though,talking things from the past and sharing some stuff about meat and being vegetarians and stuff like tad..O yea, we went into a VCD/DVD shop for about 20mins, talked about lots of movies bt ended up juz walking out empty handed..Guilt was tugging within me alittle..

aft tad sent jx home and izu sent me home n he flew somewhere..

thats today i guess

For Today And Yesterday, was at a DnT camp..Was absolutely marvalled at the amount of work we tried to do and we did. 9am-1am we were like DnTing, yes of course with breaks...

Celebrated ShengYao's birthday while we were at it too..

actually i've found out myself to be quite broke actually...
maybe should cut down on meals outside and paying for others..

Thanks to that hole in the pocket,couldn't go to a belated celebration of Sy's as had no money( seoul garden on Saturday ish not worth it...)

Went to Sakae at night with JJ(couz) and SFK a.k.a Special Fat Kid a.k.a weiming(couz de couz) to celebrate SFK's birthday..now i know Sakae's aren't worth it too..

but they do have a smart mind as they don't serve the Hot Favourite Tamago(egg) Sushi so we hav to pay more to get it..

so after a bowl of curry katsu don( super small compared to Ichiban Sushi) and few sushis went to HK Xing Wang Cafe to have the gigantic Mango Ice...

yea and its 2am now so gtg, visiting graves of my 2 grandpa and 1 grandma later at 10am

100th Post..

Went to DnT to get real fustrated and aggrivated to the point where i felt like tearing everything apart..

my design was a flop, a design where i looked so much upon..

but yet Mrs Pang took lots of time off and tried to save me from the bottomless pit called Giving Up..

Basketball games during break also lifted my spirits..Lucky i guess?

maybe life ain't tad bad??


Hopefully i can finish my DNT in time for the big O.. time limit countdown - 18Days..


After DnT went to Kovan there to pay respect to my gramps as tml would be my grandma's D.A but having DnT camp so couldn't make it on the actual day..

On my way back saw my great friend(our history goes WAAAYYY back P1.)so we stood there and chatted for quite awhile and yea..went home

Didn't go for DnT intensive today,felt feverish and was having the bout of flu..still it kind of tugged on my guilty conscience to be skipping important and crucial times lik these...

Well somehow recovered in the earli afternoon, so went to Tamp. for awhile to find Eileen, yet felt weird so juz walked past the shop only to see her and yet shes too buried with work to notice me.

went back with another 1hour plus ride and back to home...

Tired,Emotionally Drained

School is keeping me busy and buried with work up to my neck,yet somehow theres a form of unexplainable feeling of accomplishment over the dreaded touch of heticness.
we need to put up 2 performances for Drama, 1 for the school public concert Ignite,The Seasons. and the other for a compertition,National Crime Prevention.
And school work..kinda lost in it? Still trying the salvage the quick fading passionate passion i once had for Design N Technology..

And Grades hmmm..you can say not bad yet its not good either..



My holidays are kinda in a mess,timeplan is totally wrong
1st 2 weeks = intensive rememdials + drama
3rd week = alittle breather + drama + homework
4th week = drama + family activities + homework
and even when school reopens
HOME WORK SCHOOL WORK AND DRAMA!!

actually i'm enjoying 99% of the time i'm in drama. its like another family has built up in that little, naive heart that i have..Yet all good things will come to an end, for i'll be leaving after all my performances in either August or July..

Ps: though i complain about NOT being able to retire early,don't really meant it.

okay enough of the general topic.

today was another full drama day

reached school at 7:38am to draw Dance&Drama room key
no one there yet so i repacked all of the props again
well at around 8:15 we started our practice
and our make up at around 10:15
and 11:30 we left to go for the National Crime Prevention - Audition -
well its loads of undescribable fun working with everyone in Drama.
I think both the UpperSec group - The Warriors and the LowerSec group - Scammers did preettttiiieee well, of course theres room for improvement.

well hopefully for my last year, it'll be possible for both our teams to get into the finals, that'll probably change some disgusted and disappointed looks at our Drama club.(D:)

Ps: rmb no matter how hard it goes,we'll stand rooted together

well heres my Drama Family photos

www.wishing-smiles.blogspot.com..Revived..Till further notice