Watched Year One the other day, 3rd movie of the week, my wallet has plasters on them.. it was alright i guess, lame till funny kinda flim.. 3/5?

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Maybe when you look back in your memories, deep inside somewhere, you knew a person, which started off from a stranger who you never thought you would know, and slowly with time as judge, you became close friends with, as you got closer, you might think that you know this person well, but in actual fact you don't... That very stranger that became your good friend, you slowly get repulsed and irritated with that friend of yours, and slowly you find that you unconsciously reject your friend that reluctantly tries to amend, but no, you don't ease up, you badger that friend even more, every word you deny and every action you brush away.. then you find the distance slowly enlarging, theres this barrier that momentally formed after your constant signs of avoidance, then uncomfortness kicks in, then you find the relationship fades away, and slowly you distant.. you cannot see it but that very person is human too, he feels the hurt from your constant reprimandation for being himself.. then you find yourself being shunned by that very person you shut away... and in the future, you find might possibly find yourself haunted with regrets and try to make amendments, but a broken relationship needs more than you can even give, even if you managed, it'll never be the perfect feeling in the past

Midnight Fantasy

i'm sure i speak for more than one person other than myself, but the reason, the truth of why we stay up late into the night or early into the morning, is not just because we don't want the day to end but the looming darkness that present itself upon us, sparkles an undeniably charm, a jewel of self reflection, self pity, self deception, self fantasy, self interaction is born within us during this period of time, it strangely makes us think even clearer than usual, it rings a tune in our mind and heart, a tune of escaping, its a moment where you're alone and you feel like its another world, a world of peace and serenity, a world where it is truly yours... and with these reasons, we're enstrangled and enticed into the midnight fantasy

Maybe i've been trying too hard
trying too hard to love you

Perhaps i've been trying so long
to never let you go

So much that
its possible that i've already did...

It might be that i've succumb to my fate
maybe a few steps too late
trapping myself in delusions
with all the deceiving illusions.

I tried with my heart
but reciprocate isn't what i expected
i know, yet its too difficult to part
before i knew it, i'm already infected

Maybe i've had one look too much
maybe its a stab too painful
perhaps its too much for me to judge
perhaps i've already been too sinful

Saturday was a cousin outing night, went to ps, walked around, had dinner and went for beancurd then home...thanks inez,jackie,jj for treats..

Sunday was another busy day, went for my cousin baby's full month shower... the baby was so tiny and till i can figure out how to upload the photo from my phone since my bluetooth doesn't work, i'll just leave it like this...

Monday comes and at about 2pm i have Principal and Practical of Classroom Management(PPCM), the last piece of exam paper i'll see before going on my 2month break, woke up at about 8:40 and reached school by 10:15 to start studying, i mean start as in start literally.. the paper wasn't that bad i guess, but it seemed unbelievable since the scores given are high for the question and my answer was half a page long... didn't seem that i could obtain good marks...
o well =)
then after exam, went with Rachael,her bf, Kethyln, Hamidah, Rafidah O Ma, Bingxue and Peiqi Nuna to watch ORPHAN! at The Cathay, the story was really nice i reckon, scary meter was okay i think, but scare-able i guess.. 4/5 for me =)
after that to Lao Pa Sar for dinner and Fabulous Cream( city link icecream parafait ) for supper before heading home...
not a bad day at all
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Whats A Fitting Ending For A Perfect Start..Perhaps thats why its so hard..

Well Thanks Everyone for yesterday (and today) =)

Some Prawning Photo...

Prawning with SY today, it was a lousy morning to prawn...hardly any prawns. caught 11 prawns, 5 by me 6 by sy.. the boss there gave us 3 extra prawns though..
but 14 prawns for 30dollars isn't worth it..
its okay, wasted efforts just means that it can't be any worse.

Just figured that my shift key is faulty..

Listening to korean songs(2 in particular) for a change, it certainly is catchy...

A choking feeling
with the lump in my throat
a choice between reeling
or just stagnatly float

A choice to decide
A decision to choose
Moment of folly to fight
or a constrict to loose

in delusion
disregardlessly i suspect
in disbelief
regardlessly i sustain

Fantasy i enveloped
lies i surround
The truth i understood
Yet a fake i chose to live

Pretential

Brother's treat to OUTBACK STEAKHOUSE today =D

it was really good, i recommend it thought its alittle pricy and the meat aren't really cooked to our wants, e.g? I ordered Medium Well i got Medium, bro ordered Medium, got Medium Rare..

Finally ITA1 will come to an end tml, presentation will be a piece of cake, i will take it and eat it.

Plans for tml= School for presentation, Outing with Shar,Ther,Pam... Then meet with PQ and Airport to send bro off to Taiwan..

ITA PBL is pissing off everyone, yet we are still chionging headon..


Anyway, thanks to sister tan(sarah) now i harbor thoughts of opening my cheesecake shop.. details other day =D

Today was a pretty lively day spent, dinner with 7others of T02 at pizzahut which followed on into fulleton hotel's starbucks.. was an interesting day i suppose... credits to Pamela,Alicia,Bingxue,Shihui,Sarah,Peiqi,Rafidah

I suspect the world is gonna end soon... i don't know why i believe so since i'm more of a bah humbug guy to these matters...

but heres some personal proof of mine..

- Internet are crashing here and there
- Facebook and googles suddenly have breakdowns
- Airplanes Exploding
- Train goes haywire
- mobile phones are insane which makes u receive more msg than you should
- My laptop is suddenly hanging at times
- My handphone hangs at the most crucial moments.
- My mike falls apart without warning
- the moon on 8th August is at first really huge and near, but the fearsome part is that it is red in color at about 9:30pm... rather than it's usual white
but after 15mins it suddenly climbed so far high up into the sky and turned yellow...

The world seems that its ending...

if it really ends tomorrow, perhaps on 8:22 when we are all reciting the pledge, i would like everyone i met to know, my life is made up by all of you..without you i'm nothing, so i cross my heart and hope if tml is really the end, somehow, everyone would read this

maybe i should give the world a taste of my cheesecake... and start selling them ( psychoed by sarah into considering once again..)

Today, officially, 4 of my modules has ended

- Speech Trainning
- Field Practicum
- Written Communication
- Sports and Wellness

i'm suppose to leap with joy, gleam with satisfaction, and roll with relaxation but while i do that, that tingy feeling always grumble and pull at my heartstrings.. it doesn't feel like its the proper way to end... its like every other day lesson, 15 weeks seem too easy to end it, it seem that there isn't anything beneathe all those days..

I miss the children in my childcare, knowing that i won't be seeing them perhaps never again or at best 2 months later...will they remember me? or will i have to restart and reach out to them once again even when i knew them so well.. its like having your closest ones having memory lost, you know them yet you can not know them...

I miss the little jokes in STB, ms chong's cheerily chirping up n down, with her so well controlled expressions and vocals to improvise...the friendliness of the class, the small little joys we have...the chance to express through small little innounciation..

I miss the days where ms fiona smile at my groggy face, dozing off at her lesson, yet she just smiles and just ask me if i understood..and also her smiley face when we leave and enter the classroom, early or late..

I miss the days where we all play soccer and complain about the warm ups, with our victory cheers and chattery behaviour when simply goofing around, doing the stupidiest thing..

i suppose not only us but lecturers have it hard, they can't get too attached to us regardlessly, they have to live through each class each semester, one by one, getting to know everyone and then letting everyone go with only vague memory rusted with time..


within 2 and a half more years, T02 will break up, it will disperse, yes we might say we'll keep in touch but honestly for how long, yes some might be still around but it wouldn't be the same, we know yet we lie, we experience it.. i remember the sour taste when i was 12 going 13, i was elated for a day about the long break, but.. honestly up till now, no one from my primary school stayed.. i remember the angst i felt about 10months ago, where we all walked our seperate path, promising to keep it together, but no more than 3 days, a clear distinct lie was presented.. a enormous chain of class unity has broke and fell into small tiny circles that is so disfigured and no longer the same...at least those we have stayed, stayed..but we can feel the difference couldn't we. can't we?
and quickly the page will turn with the a sand through the eye, with a rub and everything will change, tears will slowly roll and the lonliness will fade in again..and nothing i do is going to change it..


I don't know why i wrote all these.. i just felt this sudden crashing weight, this burden, from my uplifting mood with shengyao at seoul garden and walking around ION, with the happiness of finally buying the book KoKology i've been eyeing, but it somehow all crumbled underneath me... i feel a misfortune, a misharp, an intensity gloomingly hovering towards me, something i would unravel... i've got a hunch of what is it, i just don't want to assume yet....the 4th person is coming, is he?



Would You Remember?
Would You remember?
Would you remember?
would you remember?
no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no,no, i know..its a no