Apologize

I'm sorry.. It got all caught up and was all wrong, you got pissed and so did i, it was a little thing and that was also why i got fustrated.. It was a game supposingly to enjoy, to curse at and to survive in, yet not to a serious fight.. It happened and so inside i thought, that was our friendship that fragile for you to get pissed at, and led to arguments, obviously i'm not that best you've got but i supposed and thought there was something worth more than that, i've listened and you've heard, i've punched and you've pinched, i've smiled and you've laughed, i've gossiped and you've rumoured but at the moment, it seemed to dispersed and didn't matter.. A small matter blown bigger, the first serious pissed argument we had, and neither of us were willing to let our egos down, i couldn't honestly, not because i got angry at the fact of you, but it just seemed to me, you had to prove me wrong and couldn't let go, it did pain me to see you like that, always complaining but still always grasping the thin air, so much that you delude yourself into negativity, I knew all these but i couldn't do a thing as always. I couldn't let it down, that breath i had to get it out, but it came out wrong and it became a bickering over a game which i've experienced and quitted, so it blew even bigger, perhaps so big that we've drifted apart in that few minute, perhaps when we hear or see each other things might get awkward.. It wasn't fair but i guess it was so. But I didn't want to see it go like that, seeing it just distant away, so i'm saying sorry and wish that none of that ever happens.

I stayed silent wasn't because i was angry but because i was holding back my cries, I just didn't know what to do.
I don't know why but it was always easy to apologize, to let my ego down but when it comes to things that truly mattered, i couldn't..