Relapse

There was a problem in the process of getting over old broken pieces. Fear of getting yourself cut in the process always held you back in moving across, you strut your legs out but then retrieve it after the possibilities strikes your mind. There would be moments when you take a few steps, but you get yourself cut on those shimmering sullen blades, so you stay there to treat yourself or you jump right back to the start. After multiple attempts, pain, consideration, obligations, contemplation, acknowledgement. You finally stride over with your eyes close as you take the plunge through, for the brighter other side regardless of all the roller coaster tracks awaiting. You reached the end, you crossed every last piece of impurities, however, you find yourself too much in pain to walk any further, so you rest yourself at the tip of the end, regardless of the danger that you might be dragged back, a relapse back.

One of the requirement to finally get over a relationship would be to determine the other party to be as the "bad" person, regardless of whatever the condition, he/she would have to be the bad person, you have to start pointing your fingers at that person stating your regrets and his/her flaws. To get over someone, you have to stop convincing yourself, you have to start thinking about everything else except anything related to that person. But in the end, regardless of how far you get in the process, why does it have to be so vulnerable to relapses.

I got so close, I was doing everything right, I did everything I could, I forgot, I stopped, I restrained, I complained, I abused, I yelled, I accused but in the end, it was always the most insignificant things happening that dragged me back across everything, your single willingness to talk to me could crush me back. But no i don't want you to be the better of us two, i don't want you to be the good person in my eyes. i can't afford that again.