Empty

Today, i felt like a transparent mirrored box.. The feeling was intense, and i couldn't form exact descriptions, empty would be the closest i could derive from.. Things seemed all so fragile, easy come and easier to go, nothing seemed that steady for me to get a grip on anymore, time didn't seem free at all, i'm insecured by the amount of plans i had done, i'm unsure if its the best alternative, its all planned and backing out isn't an option but then so why do i feel lost? Something uncomfortable is residing in my chest yet i can't put it into words or actions...What is it?? Empty?

Maybe its because i hadn't done what i wanted for a long time but only following trails that were already made, never got to, never had the chance, never asked, never answered, never responded and probably never reciprocated.

.

I kinda want to see hayley now when i finally can't

.

You don't have to read these, its just a weird dream that you won't understand..

.

I had this dream when everyone wasn't who they were..

I was driven in a car to school, yet i was allowed to keep the car, after things ended, i was forced to offer, no i wasn't even offering but everyone seemed to settle themselves into the car when i got there, i was standing outside before i got all of them out.. Then i got a text from E, saying she was coming to get a ride and i said ok, the driver seat was taken by a pri.school friend i reckon before i kicked her out, taking the seat beside A which started nagging at me fiercely, her words don't sound like any words but i could feel the fustration for some reason.. Awhile later E got in by the left back door, saying Hey~, then P and T came from the right back door to sit down, they didn't do much except for saying hi to E... After awhile, i recalled that i wasn't able to drive, i didn't know how yet everyone seemed to depend on me like i was the last transport available.. For some reason, we went to T's house, before i left, i told E to stay in the car, i'll be right back, she agreed and smiled back... Upon reaching T's house, we got lost in snacks for awhile before i started to ask T's parents if they were able to drive us using my car, with a negative answer, i sat back in the empty living room with the rest, for some reason, i was depressed and fustrated, feeling useless, T suddenly reminded me that his sis could drive, so we approached F, but she was study hard, too hard to accept my request, I then suddenly reminded of E, i ran back to where she was while trying to call her, the sky turned from amber orange to dark black while i saw E standing beside the car, she asked me why did i took so long and if we could go now, then i broke down apologizing, i had no means to, i didn't possess the ability to do so...

.maybe i really left a hole in where my heart was

These were the only details i could vision back in reference to my dreams...

was it telling me something? was it a reflection of something? did it cause today?