Sometimes its really hard, and you'll never know


Today had Picnic at Botanic Gardens with classmates ( Pam, Heather, Shar, Rafidah, Hamidah, Rachael, Rachel, Hidayah, Jingyi, Iris, Ivy, Alicia )

Mostly Frisbee kept me bubbling and bobbing around, i think i sucked at it but i don't really care..

(pictures when being sent will be uploaded)

Happy birthday to Rachael =D

I really don't know if i do like you, or are you just an excuse i came up with to forget...I'm a jerk..

Today reminded me of that one time,
that morning i woke up at 4:30am, started to cut the side of the bread that you hated and refused to eat, carefully slicing it into 4 equal slices to the best of my ability, spreading different spreads of butter and sugar, cheese, tuna spread and wine jelly onto each slice, cautiously symmetrically turning it into a tiny little sandwich filled with goodies in between, throwing it into the oven to toast it slightly so it wouldn't be too crispy to turn hard over time and not too soft so it'll be soggy afterwards, after the loud ring, i carefully place it into a tupperware, finishing it with the lid of the air tight container so you'll feel the burning heart of mine. Got dressed and ran out steathily in order not to get caught by my parents which will lead to questionings, then jumping over fences to arrive early to turn my head and look at you decending from the stairs hurriedly in your school uniform... I arrived early, but you didn't came at all, i deceived myself that you were late and waited till it was 8am, before i hung my head down, depressed by the fact that you didn't turn up for a date that i didn't date.. Those sandwich tasted terribly bitter after i failed to throw them away.. I'm still insecured if i could throw my heart for you, or it'll end up bitterly like those sandwiches?



I can't promise you that I won't disappear
Like how you can't promise me..
But i wouldn't try to disappear
If you would try to make me appear